I was diagnosed with autism at the age of three. For most of my life, my parents accommodated the condition. While I have talked about my autism with others in the past, I don’t often take time to take a look at other neurodivergent experiences, or other lived norms that affect someone’s day-to-day life. This is why I decided to check out some of the programs that the Counseling Center is now offering.
Not only do they have a weekly program called Divergent Discourse, they have other programs as well, including ones for Gusties who are grieving or queer/questioning, among others. Each program is run by a trained therapist from the Counseling Center, and each serves as a social circle of sorts. Here’s what they’re all about, including details about when each group meets.
GETTING HELP WITH GRIEF
First, I talked to administrative assistant Melanie Bexell about the Grieving Gusties program, which, as the title indicates, can be very heavy. The group is for any student who is experiencing grief of any kind, typically the loss of a friend, loved one, or family member.
“It started last year,” Bexell said. “We’ve had group workshops before, but not for grief. We decided to hash out a version of that for grieving students. The format is very casual; you come and go, and there aren’t any appointments that you have to schedule.”
The benefit to this format is its flexibility. Grief is an extremely potent, tragic life experience, and processing it is often difficult. “Everyone deals with it in their own way, on their own time,” Bexell said. “You don’t get over it easily. It only really becomes less intense as time goes on.”
Although the hardest step for many Gusties experiencing grief is to simply take the step to go to the group, anyone is welcome to attend the sessions regardless of whether they visit the Counseling Center regularly. This is why Bexell always starts sessions by thanking people for attending. “I let them know that everything they say here stays in here, and I respect what other people say and let them talk,” Bexell said.
She hopes that, eventually, the group will be student led. While she would facilitate a little bit, she aspires to as organic an approach as possible, one where students can talk about whatever is on their mind. Bexell also pointed out that sharing feelings of grief is a key part of the healing process. “When you come together with people who are going through the same thing, there is a connection and support,” she said. “That’s how I feel like it helps students. Being open and letting your guard down can be really hard, as can opening up and expressing those feelings. But I feel like that is what helps you get through grief.”
- Grieving Gusties meets from 2:30-3:30 p.m. on Thursdays
NEURODIVERGENT AWARENESS
Jessica Auel, a mental health therapist and a licensed marriage and family counselor, had a similar idea for the Divergent Discourse group that started this past fall. “Based on intake information we gather from folks to seek services through the Counseling Center, there is a growing neurodivergent population on campus,” Auel said. “We wanted to make sure that we were serving the population as best as possible and providing the support they need to thrive as college students.” Auel has made sure that the group isn’t strict about whether Gusties need to have a formal diagnosis before they attend the group, given that people do not have universal access to diagnoses and support. Because of this, the group is structured to be inclusive and welcoming of all neurotypes.
Auel has received feedback from past attendees about how they can feel extremely “unmasked.” (Masking is anything that a neurodivergent person might do to fit in with the neurotypical crowd and can involve habits such as hiding certain speech patterns, or restraining how you might have vocal or hand tics.) “There is a lot of relationship building, resource sharing, and learning about different neurotypes,” Auel said. “It’s great to have a space where you can just chat with others who have similar lived experiences and who may understand you on a deeper level.”
Having been part of this conversation myself, I certainly understand. It can sometimes be hard to relate to how someone might try to categorize my struggles, and being part of a group that shares this experience is extremely helpful. It also matters that the professionals in the Counseling Center have noticed how students are increasingly showing signs of neurodivergence on campus, for example, by increasingly being registered with accessibility resources as a part of their everyday life.
- Divergent Discourse meets from 3:30-4:30 p.m. on Fridays
IF YOU’RE QUEER OR QUESTIONING
The Queer and Questioning Group seeks to be a supportive space for LGBTQ+ Gusties and has gone strong for 11 years. “It is both a support group, and an education group,” said Aaron Geringer, the Assistant Director of the Counseling Center. “We run it based on the needs of the attendees. Some institutions have an LTBTQ+ center specifically devoted toward the LGBTQ+ student population. We don’t have that, but we recognize the importance of having a queer space at Gustavus.”
Geringer talked about how the Q&Q group serves as a tool for LTBTQ+ Gusties to talk with one another about how to navigate the holidays, discuss how they struggle, and see what resources are available. The group also hosts educational sessions. For instance, if someone wants to learn about asexuality, they can introduce a group discussion around that topic.
Geringer finds that leading this group is especially rewarding and fulfilling. “I am constantly inspired by how all the attendees show up for each other,” Geringer said. “They want to support themselves, and have that camaraderie. When someone is struggling, others will step in and help them.”
He noted that a lot of Gusties who attend this group will have shared life experiences. As a result, they want to support each other and nurture fellowship. “People don’t necessarily understand the lived experiences or needs of the trans population at Gustavus, for instance, if they haven’t lived it themselves,” Geringer said. “I highly recommend the group for anyone who wants to connect with other LGBTQ+ peers, whether they have things they are working through or not.”
Part of running the group involves navigating the differences within the LGBTQ+ community. While trans and cis identities are prevalent and have obvious differences, there is still sympathy around the queerness of trans identity. “When people are willing to listen, and try to understand, that is a nice experience,” Geringer said. “In some ways, it helps them not have to take on the burden of being an educator. Sometimes, when they seek help, they might have to take on that role, and feel like they need to coach someone through their needs.”
- Queer and Questioning: 2:30-3:30 p.m. on Fridays
In my own case, attending the Divergent Discourse meeting was extremely rewarding and afforded me an opportunity to connect with other neurodivergent peers. So, take it from me: These groups, no matter your struggles or your level of comfort with counseling, will be of tremendous help.